Top 10 Reasons Why I Love to Hate Montpellier Handball1) They are the New York Yankees of French Team Handball. They win way too often.
2) They hoard talent. How silly is it that the #1 and #2 French National Team goalies play on the same club team. Can’t some other French club fork over a few Euros to lure one of them away?
3) They can’t keep the good players home. Despite a competitive budget, they still couldn’t keep top French players like Karabatic and Dinart from leaving the country.
4) Thierry Omeyer. A Distinguished Graduate of the Bruno Martini school of facial expressions, by which a goalie is obliged to show his disgust after every scored goal. Last time I checked that happens 20-30 times a game in Team Handball. Please save it for your occasional truly bad missed saved opportunities
5) Mladen Bojinovich. Badly in need of a major haircut, this guy celebrates every goal as if it was a last second, game winning shot. He would fit right in with a high-fiving girl’s High School Volleyball team.
6) Wissem Hmam. See #5. At least he has a barber.
7) Interlude Music. Every opposing team penalty shot is subjected to the Mission Impossible theme. Another favourite is the Good, the Bad and the Ugly. Could the Darth Vader theme be next?
8) Crowd Chants. The interlude music is annoying, but it’s a travesty that “Three Cheers for the Red, White and Blue” has been turned into Mont-pell-ier, Mont-pell-ier, Mont-pell-ier…..
9) They are always on TV. Not as bad as previous years (thanks to an expanded TV contract), but still they are on TV way too often.
10) The Blue Fox Fan Club. As I am quite possibly the only native English speaker who watches Montpellier on a regular basis, I am compelled to ask why on Earth isn’t the fan club called the “le renard bleu.” Is it only for my benefit?
And OK, 1 Reason to Cheer for Montpellier Handball
1) Gregory Anquetil. He quietly and professionally gets the job done. And he saves celebration for the times that it’s truly worth it. I think his last second, 9 meter goal vs Flensburg was the first time I saw him truly excited.